(Random post that never got published)

   Last night, Princess went to Nanny & Papa's house.  We had the never ending discussion of "where to go for dinner", after about 20 minutes of discussions, we finally decide to take K out for some Pizza.. he is so crazy over his pizza!  

   Right now,  Ks obsession is Faith getting all my attention.   He lets me off the hook,  telling ME it's ok, she's just like that.  He just thinks that she is out to get all the attention.  :(      Makes me think about that tiny rat trying to steal the world. NOT that either f my children are rats.. lol. Pinky & the Brain!!

  I wish I had an answer for this.  I have a saying.."the worst lies are the ones you tell yourself".  If I told you or myself that Faith isn't all about the attention,  there we would all be. . Talking about my lies..lol.  She is an amazing child,  funny, quick witted & very smart!  

I am now very aware of my actions  I thought that I was letting him be him. .by letting him be independent.   He needed more from me! 

Another theory proven.. People need to be accountable! 

Dilly.. my sweet Dilly

Why is this so hard for me??

I have got to stay on this. .. today seems like a good day to vent, cry & whatever else blogging is supposed to be about!

A couple of months ago, we got 3 dogs.  Only one was a great fit for our family.   As a matter of fact. ..he was the perfect dog.  I found homes for the other two.  Quite simply..my heart was so full & happy with my Dilly 《Dillinger》  We have had the most fun ever with this little guy.   Well my life has just kinda fallen apart lately.. today (I pray) was as bad as I can imagine it getting.   I haven't been able to drag myself out of bed for 2 days... I walked to get myself a drink.. looked down..there was my Dilly,  limp & lifeless in his Kennel.  Idk if me getting him out was a bad idea.  He woke up & started trying to fight.  Unfortunately we lost that fight.  He is gone now. ..

I'm so devastated!   I just feel that this is so horrible.. I don't even know what to do.  So... I cry... cry... and cry...

I'm so defeated at this point in my life...